Piranha 3D tries to do things a little differently compared to the film it’s based on—a contrast to the 1995 version—and some aspects are enjoyable, like the gore, but overall it isn't something I would choose to watch again. It doesn’t have the same tight pacing or entertainment value as Joe Dante’s movie, and the visual effects aren’t particularly believable either. Seeing the 3D sequences now is amusing (in a r…

Richard Dreyfuss appeared in Jaws back in 1975, and then thirty-five years later he had a small part in Piranha. It seems clear his connection to the earlier film was the only reason for his inclusion, as his character is eliminated before his name even shows up in the opening credits. Dreyfuss isn't the only one; Elisabeth Shue and Ving Rhames also have roles that feel exploitative. There’s no chance Jack Lemmon …

Piranhas attack as a group – not for safety, but to use sheer power. It seems that many of today's younger moviegoers go to theaters together; they have clear preferences and know how to enjoy even movies that are silly or basic. I’m not criticizing this, it simply reflects the kind of films available to them, which is why movies like this Piranha remake, reimagining, or update exist and make money—sometimes even …

This is a reimagining of an older, frankly terrible, film. I picked it up because it’s been receiving surprisingly positive feedback from both professional reviewers and audiences. I honestly can't figure out why. There are countless superior films in the action, horror, and fantasy categories that critics routinely tear apart. It completely escapes me how this movie managed to get such high marks. The female c…

When monstrous, inbred, cannibalistic, devilish, prehistoric piranhas emerge from beneath the earth to terrorize the small town of Lake Victoria during "Spring Break," the result is fairly predictable. There are scantily clad women, exposed skin, blood, bizarre occurrences, and noticeably poor performances. The film was made for $24M and features very few recognizable actors in prominent roles. Although Eli Roth (…