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The King of Queens — Season 5
#Episode nameAir dateRuntimeRating
01
25mArthur, SpoonerShe had been entrusted with a significant responsibility: overseeing a team tasked with preparing and distributing legal documents for one of the firm's most important cases. The work would require night shifts, and the team was...unconventional. Doug felt a pang of disappointment; her new role meant they would have less time together. However, he resolved to seize the opportunity for personal indulgence. He would eat in bed, forgo nightly brushing, indulge in any whim. Loneliness soon crept in,Sep 23, 20027.5Sep 23, 200225m7.502
25mWindow PainThe arrival of the Heffernans next door cast a noticeable shadow over the neighborhood. Their first impression was far from favorable; a constant murmur of argument drifted through the air. Carrie, in particular, felt acutely aware of the disparity between her own life as a legal secretary and Doug's as a truck driver, and the seemingly more distinguished careers of her new neighbors. She longed to make a good impression, extending an invitation to dinner, but Doug’s reluctance thwarted her effoSep 30, 20027.4Sep 30, 200225m7.403
25mHoly MackerelAt the fish market, the Heffernans encountered Father McAndrew, exchanging greetings as they prepared to leave. As they parted, he expressed a desire to see them at church. Uncertain how to politely decline, they readily agreed to attend Sunday services. During the service, Carrie mused on her most pressing need: a raise. The next day brought a surprising turn – her wish had been granted. However, Carrie’s prayers soon shifted to more trivial matters, such as shoe sales. Doug attempted to dissuaOct 7, 20027.1Oct 7, 200225m7.104
25mKirbed EnthusiasmA request arrived, unexpected and demanding: assist in coaching an eight-year-old's football team. The proposition sparked an unlikely challenge from the boy himself – to try out for a semi-professional squad. Carrie, however, regarded the notion with apprehension, a sentiment that softened only after encountering a peculiar photograph of Doug.Oct 14, 20027.3Oct 14, 200225m7.305
25mMammary LaneThe team prepared for the tournament, a shared ambition fueling their efforts. Meanwhile, Carrie accepted a babysitting job for Mr. Kaplan’s son, envisioning it as a step forward in her career. However, a moment of playful flirtation from Doug and an unforeseen encounter with Mr. Kaplan's son set in motion a series of complications, threatening to unravel everything.Oct 21, 20027.3Oct 21, 200225m7.306
25mBusiness AffairsDoug found himself in Carrie’s office, introduced to Curt, her work partner. Carrie offered reassurances about Curt, mentioning his sexual orientation, but Doug felt a prickle of unease at their easy camaraderie. During lunch, they shared industry secrets and a comfortable intimacy that unsettled him. He voiced his concerns to Carrie, only to be met with the reminder that he shared a similar closeness with Deacon. The comparison rankled, and soon both Doug and Carrie found themselves vying for aOct 28, 20026.9Oct 28, 200225m6.907
25mFlame ResistantAt his favorite sports bar, Doug encountered Margie, his high school girlfriend. Carrie, his companion, felt a pang of jealousy as she realized Doug’s mother seemed to favor Margie. A familiar tension arose between the two women over a song Doug had promised to write for Margie years ago. Determined to make amends, Doug sought help from Danny in an attempt to finally complete the composition.Nov 4, 20027.4Nov 4, 200225m7.408
25mFlash PhotographyHe took a mischievous picture with the disposable camera the bride and groom had given him, letting Danny take the fall. Later, confessing to a priest, he faced the daunting task of finally revealing the truth.Nov 11, 20026.5Nov 11, 200225m6.509
25mConnect FourCarrie secured four tickets to a Knicks game, a generous offering, but she insisted on taking a couple of companions from Doug’s circle. However, the arrangement proved problematic; Carrie’s chosen partners didn't mesh with Doug, and his preferred attendees weren't a good fit for her. Recognizing the impasse, they resolved to orchestrate a more harmonious pairing. Meanwhile, Arthur found himself in a predicament, attempting to resolve parking violations with dubious promises of assistance.Nov 18, 20027.3Nov 18, 200225m7.310
25mLoaner CarThe deception began subtly, a delicate weave of falsehoods intended to ease the burden of a holiday obligation. But lies, like tangled threads, have a way of unraveling. As Doug sought to delegate his responsibilities, replacing a trusted colleague with a more… amenable one, the carefully constructed facade began to crumble. Each attempt to conceal the truth only deepened the mire, drawing him further into a labyrinth of his own making. The web of deceit he spun tightened around him, a suffocatiNov 25, 20027.3Nov 25, 200225m7.311
25mMentalo CaseA quiet tension had settled between Deacon and Doug, a subtle shift in their relationship born from a misunderstanding. The warmth that once flowed easily now felt strained, replaced by an unspoken distance.
Meanwhile, Carrie wrestled with the desire to create a memorable Christmas for her father. She envisioned a gift that truly reflected his spirit, but the season seemed determined to thwart her efforts. A series of misinterpretations and unintended presents had left everyone feeling adrifDec 16, 20027.8Dec 16, 200225m7.812
25mJung FrankensteinCarrie persuaded Doug to seek therapy for his eating disorder, and was pleased by his progress. She then encouraged the therapist to address other underlying issues. Meanwhile, Arthur wrestled with a perceived dependence on nasal spray, determined to break free from it.Jan 6, 20036.9Jan 6, 200325m6.913
25mAttention DeficitDoug found himself consumed by the impending Super Bowl party, a desperate attempt to recapture a sense of connection with Carrie. He envisioned the event as a crucial opportunity – a chance to win back her attention, to prove his attentiveness. While he meticulously planned every detail, striving for an unforgettable spectacle, Carrie voiced a growing discontent. She felt overlooked, that Doug’s focus had shifted entirely to the game and its guests, leaving her feeling neglected during the everJan 20, 20036.6Jan 20, 200325m6.614
25mPrints CharmingA shared collection of photographs offered a glimpse into lives seemingly more vibrant than their own. Doug and Carrie, while browsing through the images of another couple, found themselves questioning the trajectory of their own existence. A subtle discontent began to brew, fueled by a yearning for a life that appeared effortlessly joyful. They started to emulate the actions captured in the pictures, hoping to replicate the happiness they witnessed. Meanwhile, Arthur's latest technological acquFeb 3, 20037.1Feb 3, 200325m7.115
25mAnimal AttractionHe was tasked with a peculiar delivery: penguins, accompanied by Deacon, from one zoo to another on Valentine's Day. The journey proved fraught with unexpected complications. Meanwhile, Carrie and Holly embarked on a mission to offer dating advice to Hall, but Carrie’s efforts inadvertently led to a match with her own boss. Elsewhere, Arthur and Spence sought a date for the holiday, only to find themselves paired with someone remarkably aged.Feb 10, 20037.7Feb 10, 200325m7.716
25mGolden MoldyThe vacation had begun with a lightness of spirit, a shared joy with neighbors on St. Croix. But the carefree atmosphere fractured with the arrival of Arthur's call, delivering grim news about the house's hidden mold. Suddenly, the holiday cheer evaporated, replaced by a looming sense of unease.Feb 17, 20038.3Feb 17, 200325m8.317
25mS'Poor HouseThe problem in the Heffernan household deepened, and Doug and Carrie discovered the solution would cost them twelve thousand dollars. With a heavy heart, Doug approached his father for the funds, only to be met with a firm refusal when he inquired about their lack of savings. His father insisted on a thorough review of their finances. This led Doug to restrict Carrie’s spending, a move that sparked considerable resentment.Feb 24, 20038.0Feb 24, 200325m8.018
25mSteve MoscowThe old house groaned under the weight of disrepair, each creak a lament for forgotten craftsmanship. Hope seemed lost until a desperate idea took root: a potent offering, a cultural bridge, a gamble on camaraderie – vodka. They offered it freely, liberally, a shimmering promise of ease and goodwill. Each shared glass was a negotiation, a plea for skill, a silent understanding that sometimes, the most effective solutions require a touch of unconventional persuasion. The air thickened with theMar 10, 20038.4Mar 10, 200325m8.419
25mCowardly Lyin'Doug dreaded the opera. He’d rather face a firing squad. Thankfully, Deacon was on hand to help him navigate a delicate deception. Carrie, his companion for the evening, had a way of making things…difficult. Doug needed an out, and fast.
The plan was simple: feign illness. But Carrie, with her uncanny ability to see through any façade, quickly sensed something amiss. She cornered him, her gaze sharp. Caught in the web of his lies, Doug crumbled, confessing a cascade of hidden deceptions.Mar 31, 20037.8Mar 31, 200325m7.820
25mDriving ReignDanny sought a recommendation from Doug at IPS, hoping it would pave his way to a driver position. Doug, however, was not receptive to the idea. Undeterred, Carrie volunteered to write the letter, requesting only that Doug sign it. Danny secured the job and quickly found himself under Doug's scrutiny. His performance, particularly his ability to outperform Doug in delivery times, impressed the boss, who subsequently reassigned Doug’s route to Danny, putting Doug's position in jeopardy.Apr 14, 20037.6Apr 14, 200325m7.621
25mClothes EncounterHe couldn't seem to stop acquiring expensive clothes, only to return them within days. His new girlfriend, however, harbored a deeper apprehension – a fear of his dog. She’d made it clear that he needed to choose: the dog, or her.Apr 21, 20037.3Apr 21, 200325m7.322
25mQueens'bro BridgeDoug orchestrated a reunion between Arthur and Skitch at the tollbooth where Skitch worked on the freeway. The unexpected meeting stirred something within Doug, a glimmer of hope for reclaiming his personal life. He imagined an empty basement, quiet moments with Carrie – a return to normalcy. Arthur moved in with Skitch, but their attempt at cohabitation proved disastrous, a stark reminder that some things are better kept separate.Apr 28, 20037.4Apr 28, 200325m7.423
25mDog ShelterThe story unfolded in fragments, a curious tapestry woven with time and affection. It began with a simple statement: Doug had a dog when he was eleven. A dog he still had, apparently. The revelation hung in the air, a delightful surprise. But as the details emerged, the narrative deepened, revealing layers of history and a quiet, enduring bond.
"He had a dog when he was eleven," Janet confided, "and they still have it today."
The years melted away with that phrase, conjuring images of youMay 5, 20037.6May 5, 200325m7.624
25mTaste BudsHe sought what he desired from her, employing Arthur as an intermediary when direct requests proved fruitless. Meanwhile, Spence stood at the front of the line, eager for the new film's release.May 12, 20037.9May 12, 200325m7.925
25mBed SpreadThey found themselves in a new arrangement, a consequence of a shared desire for separate slumber. A new bed was ordered, and until its arrival, they made do with borrowed twin beds. The simple change brought about a noticeable shift in their marriage, a welcome improvement in their nights apart. Arthur, however, discovered a surprising facet of their neighbor, Lou Ferrigno. A clandestine listening through a basement window revealed Lou’s penchant for gossip. Arthur resolved to shield his privacMay 19, 20037.9May 19, 200325m7.9
