W2TCH

Son of the Beach (2000 – 2002)

2000 • 3 seasons • Comedy • TV-14
On September 29, 2026
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All seasons

Son of the Beach — Season 3

14 episodes · Jun 18, 2002

1. Penetration Island
Jun 18, 2002 · 44m

Notch and the gang head to the Island of Bulimia by Tex Finklestein at ""UBM"" wanting higher ratings. When they get there, they are to play ""Penetration Island"", where the grand prize is $1,000,00. While everyone is being tempted or se…

2. Saturday Night Queefer
Jun 25, 2002

Johnny Queefer returns to town to take on his dreams of becoming a broadway star. Johnny dances at one point with Porcelain and drops her and she cuts open her breasts and all the saline squirts out. Because of this, Notch bans all dancing…

3. In the Line of Booty
Jul 2, 2002

Someone tries to kill rapper Larry ""Biggy"" Little, and Jamaica's new rapper boyfriend is blamed.

4. Three Days of the Condom
Jul 9, 2002

When Notch's gang finds out that B.J. has gone missing from her D.C. internship, the gang travels to D.C. to find her. Having almost given up, Notch and the SPF-30 finally get their BJ, who is alive but has amnesia and that she is pregnant.…

5. Witness for the Prostitution
Jul 16, 2002

Notch is honored at the State Univeristy College of Malibu Adjacent (S.U.C.M.A., home of the Cocks) with the opening of a lavatory science building named after him. But all is not well. After a lifeguard group therapy session (with Chappy a…

6. The Gay Team
Jul 23, 2002

A villain named ""Heinous Anus"" (RuPaul) is making young men disappear from the beach, and they are all ending up in a place called ""Gaytrix"". Chip ends up being captured by Heinous Anus and taken to the Gaytrix so that he turn him gay …

7. You Only Come Once
Jul 30, 2002

Stinkfinger wants revenge on the people of the world because he didn't get workman's compensation because of an explosion that occured where he was working and he seeks revenge by trying to control the weather around the world. Notch's fri…

8. Hamm Stroker's Suck My Blood
Aug 6, 2002

When foreign lifeguards start getting killed at the Lifeguard of the Year Convention, Notch is forced to watch over his Israeli counterpart, Noccus Johnstein.

9. Godfather Knows Best
Aug 13, 2002

Jamaica is shocked when Vinnie Fellachio claims to be the father she has never known.

10. Empty the Dragon
Aug 20, 2002

Notch travels to Japan with Kimberlee, Chip and Porcelain for the Nagasaki Fried Chicken (NFC) Karaoke Championships. To Porcelain's dismay, the blonde Kimberlee gets all the attention from the press. Notch gets involved with Binaka, whose …

11. The Long Hot Johnson
Aug 27, 2002

Notch's old wet nurse Aunt Jizzy and company come to him with stories of Klan activity in South Malibu Adjacent and a scheme led by the notorious Bull Cracker to cheat them out of their homes. So Notch joins the all-white South Malibu Adjac…

12. Taco Lips Now (1)
Sep 17, 2002

In a flashback to Notch's war days, we see how his commanding officer Colonel Kooze ""improperly disposed of"" the village of Tam Pon. Kooze implores Notch to ""never tell"" about this atrocity. Later Notch sees the guilty colonel hanging f…

13. Jailhouse Notch (2)
Sep 24, 2002

Notch is convicted of the war crime and goes to jail, where he meets all sorts of unsavory characters, but soon he breaks out and begins his search for Colonel Kooze so he can clear his name. But there are some surprises back at Malibu Adja…

14. Bad News, Mr. Johnson (3)
Oct 1, 2002

""Master of disguise"" Notch Johnson is on the run and he spends some time hiding out at Aunt Jizzy's, where he learns that Kooze and Harry have conspired to move up Harry and Kimberlee's wedding date to the next day. Kooze knows Notch will…