Dave spoke with Stephanie about an incident from the previous weekend, one that he claimed had transpired. Meanwhile, Alan made a suggestive proposition to Secretary of Labor Elaine L. Chao. And Al Franken took the opportunity to promote hi…

Kings of Leon delivered their acclaimed breakthrough song, "Molly's Chambers."

Biff haunts the city streets, eyes scanning for faces he recognizes from the pages of magazines. Meanwhile, General Tommy Franks, recently relinquished from his service, often reflects upon the distinguished path of his military life.

The program "CBS Mailbag" featured a variety of elements: Stephanie in a Batman costume, Vinnie Favale, the CBS Vice President of Late Night Programming, and Gerard, portraying George W. Bush.

Paul’s run of defeats on “Stump the Band” persists, while Whoopi Goldberg is currently promoting her latest television comedy.

Dave extended a welcome to 2003 U.S. Open Men's Tennis Champion Andy Roddick and actor Jack Black. He recalled the late Warren Zevon with fondness, referencing the Show #1895 tape where Warren sang "Mutineer" on October 30, 2002; Paul and t…

Rick Derringer joins the ensemble, and a woman from Staten Island takes part in the segment, "May We See Your Digital Photos, Please?" Chris Elliott offers his observations on the news of the day.

A soprano's voice drifted from the hallway, a soaring lament against the quiet. In a more peculiar turn of events, the recently departed Charles Bronson announced his intention to run for Governor of California. Meanwhile, in a room elsewhe…

Dressed as Don Mattingly, Steph and Monty appeared on CBS Mailbag. They concluded the segment with a game of catch alongside Dave.

A significant announcement is forthcoming from Dave. Cuba Gooding, Jr. is championing *The Fighting Temptations*. Meanwhile, Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel perform their iconic rendition of "America" and "The Boxer."

Ericka Dunlap, Miss America of 2004, introduces the Top Ten list. Dave recounts an eventful weekend spent encountering a bear on his Montana property. Following this, Dr. Phil offers Dave some advice on raising children.

Ben Stiller discusses his latest film, *Duplex*; and Elvis Costello presents a piece from his newest album, *North*.

The scene opens with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson demonstrating a technique to Lynne Cheney, a maneuver he calls a "chicken wing," applied to Paul. Simultaneously, New York Giants kicker Matt Bryant engages in the unusual pursuit of rooftop fi…

Stephanie embodies the spirit of Peter Pan for "CBS Mailbag"; "Joey Pants" champions "The Handler"; Kevin Nealon appears in the latter; and Outkast delivers their hit, "Hey Ya."

Paul inquired of "Survivor" alum Ryan "Skinny" Shoulders, the latter sporting a Rage Against The Machine t-shirt, whether he appreciated Audioslave. Denzel Washington was lending his support to the release of "Out of Time." And the New York…

The question of how many men can occupy an eyeglass shop while dressed as gorillas is at hand. As Dave succinctly put it, "I had intended to purchase spectacles, but the optical store was overrun with gorillas."

The recent roster includes a curious entry: Michele O'Callaghan’s five-month-old daughter, affectionately called Zoogie, has developed a penchant for selecting Dave’s ties. Dave and Paul are bewildered by a pitching machine featured in a ne…

For the "Know Your Current Events" segment, Steph and Monty adopted the guise of letter carriers. The evening also featured a performance by R.E.M., who played "Bad Day."

On the CBS program *Mailbag*, Alan adopts the guise of Saddam Hussein for his latest hidden-camera venture, "Goof'd!" The resulting prank, however, takes a dangerous turn when he is physically assaulted by several individuals in public. Sub…

Jessica Simpson recently appeared on *Oprah*, a development that reportedly displeased Dave. Meanwhile, bandleader Todd Rundgren performed "Hello It's Me," and Pat Farmer executed the feat of dropping twenty thousand ping-pong balls from a …

Dave referred to the former California governor, Gray Davis, with a dismissive term. Gary Coleman appeared via satellite to present the Top Ten list, only to succumb to sleep mid-presentation. Meanwhile, Tom Dressen discussed baseball.

From Charlotte, North Carolina, a man tests his knowledge of the 2003 Boston Red Sox. Simultaneously, ten Hooters Girls unveil their Top Ten picks. And George Clooney promotes *Intolerable Cruelty*.

On the latest episode of CBS Mailbag, Alan finds himself in an unexpectedly uncomfortable encounter with the girl who bestowed his first kiss. Meanwhile, Gerard engages in a surprisingly insightful discussion with Dave. And in a separate se…

A cascade of unusual confetti rains down from the theater roof, orchestrated by Pat Farmer and a dedicated crew of stagehands. Inside, Steph/Monty recounts to "Survivor 7" contestant Burton Roberts a dubious tale of a woodpecker’s recent as…

After a considerable hiatus, celebrated saxophonist David Sanborn joins the ensemble. He announces his intention to enter rehabilitation, followed by a request for Dunkin' Donuts. John Cusack is currently promoting "Runaway Jury," and Scott…

Dave offered congratulations to Conan O'Brien on the arrival of his newborn daughter. A panel of ten weightlifters presented their rankings of the top performers. Meanwhile, renowned physics professor Brian Greene attempted to elucidate the…

From Iraq, ten American soldiers broadcast their list of the top ten via satellite. Actor Dustin Hoffman promotes his film, "The Runaway Jury," while British chef Jamie Oliver prepares a dish of scallops.

For the CBS Mailbag segment, Steph and Monty adopt the guise of soccer players, engaging in a series of somewhat clumsy kicks aimed at the studio audience. Following this, Radiohead delivers a performance of their song "2+2=5."

A sneeze punctuates the speaker's words. The band's space has undergone renovations. Biff delivers his yearly report from the World Series. Outside, a pumpkin of nearly a thousand pounds bursts apart, the sound amplified by special effects.

Dave shared the news of his transfer to Chesterton, Indiana. Tonight's episode of "Meet the Governor" features a young Arnold Schwarzenegger captivated by an exotic dancer; Courtney Cox Arquette nearly sings TLC's "Waterfalls;" and followin…

On a rare Wednesday broadcast of CBS's *Mailbag*, Steph and Monty donned festive elf costumes. Meanwhile, Rupert observed his annual tradition of watching the gradual shift in color of the coleslaw. And Dave, captivated by the Canadian "sex…

The Slapinski Brothers, renowned for their juggling prowess, broke into the conversation. Dave offered a detail: Rupert had appeared on last night’s episode of "Ed." Meanwhile, Dante Hall, of the Kansas City Chiefs, made a spectacular catch…

This year’s collection of novelty Halloween costumes includes a George Foreman grill, the superfluous button on a seldom-used remote, and the assembled team from “Queer Eye.” Additionally, Rosie Perez provides Paul with a cape for his weekl…

The champions of the 2003 New York City Marathon make their yearly appearance in the studio. Shawn Cohen, a former contestant on "Survivor 7" who was eliminated, and Osten Taylor, the player who voluntarily left the competition, stop by Rup…

Dave recounts the events preceding and encompassing the arrival of son Harry Joseph Letterman yesterday; "Indian Larry" executes motorcycle stunts on 53rd Street; Regis maintains his tradition of appearing at significant events; and Amy Bre…

In the segment known as Mailbag, Steph and Monty playfully dress up a police officer, while Dave attempts to decipher the reference to "Liza Minnelli"—a character played by Gerard in fishnet stockings. The episode concludes with the surpris…

The latest oddities include Harry & David's line of refurbished fruit, a Victoria's Secret collection designed for monkeys, and a special edition of *California Style* featuring models who have, reportedly, been touched inappropriately by A…

During the segment "Know Your Current Events," a helpful elf named Perry assisted the hosts. The discussion took a turn when Bert and Ernie, the familiar duo from "Sesame Street," offered their critiques of Dave. Later, Lauren Graham shared…

Dave shared that Oprah had sent him a gift for the new baby, only to discover it had been delivered by someone with the identical name. Meanwhile, throughout the night, weightlifter Willie Wessels displayed feats of strength that seemed bey…

The segment began with Dave offering a compliment on Madonna’s newest children’s book. “I like the picture of the monkey,” he observed. Immediately following this, Chris Elliott appeared, introducing Dave’s son, Harry, who, in a surprising …

The shepherd led his flock into the theater, a curious procession accompanying him. As they entered, Pink began to sing "Trouble."

As part of the program "Know Your Current Events," a guest from Liverpool, England, was questioned about his familiarity with Prince Charles. Subsequently, Al Franken, a prospective candidate for governor of Minnesota, presented Paul with h…

In a recurring bit from his theatrical repertoire, Dave presents the inner lining of his sportcoat as if it were a garment itself. He then launches into a tale of a mother and her two sons attempting to flag down a taxi this morning. And a …

A friendly arm-wrestling contest took place at Hello Deli, where young actress Dakota Fanning promoted her film, "The Cat in the Hat."

On 53rd Street, Ashrita Furman, known as "Mr. Versatility," performs the delicate feat of balancing beer glasses on his chin. Meanwhile, eleven Playboy Playmates unveil their ranking in the Top Ten. Elsewhere, Dave engages General Wesley Cl…

Dave and Paul engage in a game of "Potatoes or Gavin MacLeod?" Dave voices his disappointment that Paris Hilton has withdrawn from next week's broadcast. Robert Downey Jr. makes a return appearance, his first since the spring of 1996. Sixte…

Biff accompanied Howard Dean on a day of campaigning. Gerard filled in for Rupert Boneham, who was unable to attend. Paul Newman offered insights into the world of auto racing. And Clay Aiken performed "Invisible," a song from his album *Me…

The program began with a startling revelation: Tom Ridge had reportedly informed on Michael Jackson. Later, Dave launched into another lengthy tirade concerning Paris Hilton, insisting she would not be appearing because a "no-good weasel, b…

In the segment known as Mailbag, Harold Larkin samples an unfamiliar item, followed by a Thanksgiving-themed bit where he humorously simulates the act of bleeding gravy. Meanwhile, Mike Myers promotes his film, *The Cat in the Hat*.

Dorothy, appearing via satellite, regaled everyone with tales of her five grandchildren, a lively brood spanning from thirty-two years down to just one month. She once again impressed Dave with her signature apple and pecan Thanksgiving pie…

During the televised event "Stump The Band," Felecia offered a playful jab at Donny Osmond. Meanwhile, Jessica Alba, formerly of "Dark Angel," made a promotional appearance for Honey. The Rapture delivered a performance of their song, "Hous…

For much of the opening segment, Rupert appears, offering glimpses from his recent journey to the Meadowlands to cover the Jets-Titans game. He then engages in conversation with Christa Hastie, recently eliminated from *Survivor*. Separatel…

Dave notes his son has a habit of picking his nose. Biff and his team adorn taxi cabs with Christmas decorations. Danny DeVito promotes the film *Big Fish*.

In the segment known as Mailbag, Alan’s internal dialogues invariably lead to the tragic destruction of his cherished ceramic figures. Furthermore, after encountering an article in *Time* detailing Oprah's decision to exclude Dave from her …

A wave of quiet excitement rippled through the room as Dave shared the news: he had finally received an invitation to appear on Oprah. The moment felt years in the making. But the celebratory atmosphere was quickly tempered by Julia Roberts…

A brief gathering of familiar faces occurred during the Late Show’s Christmas preparations, as former purveyors of Broadway delights – Mujibur, Sirajul, and Joe G. – joined Rupert in adorning the festive tree. Later, Dave offered his perspe…

In the segment known as Mailbag, Dave grapples with a query regarding "Saddam Hussein" from Gerard, all while a reindeer unexpectedly deposits waste during a live performance. Meanwhile, Neve Campbell lends her voice to promotion for Robert…

At the "Audience Show & Tell" event, a man astounded the crowd by reciting the names of all fifty states, presented in alphabetical order, within a mere fifteen seconds. Meanwhile, Golden Globe nominee Charlize Theron appeared to promote he…

Dave recounts a peculiar piece of counsel his mother offered regarding Harry: "You know, David," she said, "it might be good for him to join a gang someday." Meanwhile, The Kalter Brothers perform "The Little Drummer Boy" without any disrup…

The Late Show's annual "Holiday Night" unfolded with its customary charm. Paul delivered his rendition of Cher singing "O Holy Night," a performance that drew much attention. Jay Thomas once again proved his dexterity, skillfully dislodging…

Dave acknowledges Biff with a nod of gratitude, along with Paul, the USO, and several soldiers, for their efforts in making the Christmas Eve journey to Baghdad a reality. In the debut episode of "Will It Explode?", Pat Farmer launches eigh…

Dave marked Steph and Monty’s birthday with a cake bearing the inscription "Happy Birthday Tammi!" Additionally, recently inducted members of the Baseball Hall of Fame, Paul Molitor and Dennis Eckersley, present their list of the Top Ten.

In conversation with Nathan Lane, Dave proposes to Paul that they collaborate on a production of "The Producers." Meanwhile, Ruben Stoddard delivers a performance of "Sorry 2004."

The familiar ritual of "Stump the Band" is upon us. Paul launches into his characteristic, almost mystical pronouncements, as ten interns present their selections for the Top Ten. Billy Bob Thornton recounts his brief career as an assistant…

Dave launched into a spirited critique of Jay Leno’s presence on the CBS "People's Choice Awards" website, while Dick Gephardt proceeded with the announcement of the Top Ten winners.

The day's correspondence includes a report of Alan being unexpectedly assaulted by an irate Irishman, George Clarke sharing a shower with the legendary basketball player Manute Bol, and Steph and Monty offering insightful details about the …

As the night wore on, a chorus of foreign laughter filled the air. Dave and Paul engaged in a peculiar game they’d invented, posing the question, “Mars or Nevada?” before inevitably declaring its utter absurdity. Al Roker unveiled his Top T…

The afternoon's "Audience Show & Tell" featured a Texan woman presenting photographs of her Chinese Crested dog, adorned in an array of costumes. Dave then offered a reading of a fan letter, the query within concerning the crucial question …

Stephanie once again showcases her ex-boyfriend's rather uninspired dancing. Meanwhile, John McEnroe delivers his Top Ten list and plugs his latest talk show. Gavin MacLeod makes a cameo in "Potatoes or Gavin MacLeod?" and, as the program c…

John Mayer joins the discussion as Dave presents footage of Howard Dean’s infamous head-bobbing moment. In this installment of "Pat Farmer's Gaffe Alert," the show's resident film enthusiast and stagehand observes that the complete ensemble…

Dave’s attempts at mimicking Howard Dean are remarkably poor. During the Mailbag segment, Rupert serves a decidedly unappetizing piece of turkey in the soup of the day. Meanwhile, Dave engages in conversation with a mountaineer who recounts…

Dave offers a series of photographs addressing the persistent query, "What is the story behind Donald Trump's hair?" Meanwhile, Howard Dean delivers his Top Ten list live via satellite from New Hampshire.

Al Franken reflected on his recent journey to Iraq, while Phantom Planet delivered a performance of their song, "Big Brat."

Dave offered a moment of remembrance for the late Jack Paar, a titan of the late-night television landscape. Biff then launched into his yearly "Biff at the Super Bowl" feature. Meanwhile, Bill DeLace conducted another Top Ten countdown, th…

Dave made a surprising announcement: after two decades of sobriety, he intended to resume drinking, but strictly within the confines of the program. He then offered Oprah Winfrey a belated wish for a happy 50th birthday.

Dave notes that the building is currently without running water. During the segment known as Mailbag, Pat Farmer subjects a stagehand to the indignity of a George Foreman Grill. Dave then presents a fabricated video clip purporting to show …

Dave recounted the incident that occurred last night on 53rd Street: snowboarder Tara Dakides lost her balance while dismounting a platform and fell onto the street. She was transported to Bellevue Hospital in New York City, where she recei…

Dave spoke with snowboarder Tara Dakides, whose injury during a demonstration on 53rd Street led to the cancellation of last Thursday's taping. Additionally, in celebration of the 40th anniversary of Beatlemania, Paul delivers an Ed Sulliva…

Rupert chooses a participant from the audience on 53rd Street for the game "What Did Merv Have For Lunch?" Meanwhile, Drew Barrymore and Jack Hanna maintain their attire throughout their appearances.

Dave experimented with a new phrase, testing it out with a playful delivery: "Ba da boom, ba da bing." Meanwhile, Steph and Monty transformed a figurine of an 1980s Olympic hockey player with an assortment of period clothing, prompting Dave…

The CBS Orchestra provided a continuous soundtrack of Air Supply throughout the night. Dave remarked that Australia had specifically requested the inclusion of the clip depicting a monkey washing a cat. Meanwhile, Bill Murray acquired a tat…

This week's installment of "Will It Float?" features a box of chocolates, alongside a visit from Alec Baldwin and Sofia Coppola, and a performance of "Red Blooded Women" by Kylie Minogue.

Dave found amusement in a recently aired commercial, and the network repeatedly showed the clip throughout the evening. Later, during the segment known as "Stupid Human Tricks," a man was seen attempting to fit a tennis ball into his mouth.…

Leon Russell is present. Dave remains captivated by a line from the previous night’s film trailer – “If you need help, here I am” – repeating it frequently as the show progresses. Meanwhile, Dale Earnhardt, Jr. and Kelly Ripa both undertake…

The episode featured Steph, Monty, and Smitty in elaborate costumes, with Smitty embodying Dale Earnhardt, Jr. Meanwhile, Gerard, portraying "Senator John Kerry," boasted of the advantages of marrying into a prominent ketchup dynasty. A Mon…

Renowned hypothermia researcher Dr. Gordon Geisbrecht immerses himself in a tank of icy water to illustrate the condition's impact. The United States Senate has decreed that the term "president" will be enclosed in quotation marks when refe…

During the segment known as "Audience Show & Tell," Dave encounters a former White House intern. George Clarke steps in to replace Kiva "Grinder Girl" Kahl for the segment "Will It Float?" Meanwhile, comedian Brian Regan offers his observat…

A planned demolition demonstration on 53rd Street, halted by the office of Mayor Bloomberg, took an unexpected turn when Pat Farmer began discarding items from the building's roof. Rob Cesternino, a recent contestant eliminated from a compe…

The Late Show featured a double dose of familiar faces last night. Edie Falco was on hand to discuss the upcoming fifth season of "The Sopranos," while Dave met with Steven Bailey, known for his role in "My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé." And E…

Dressed in full dental attire, adopting the precise posture requested by Dave, Stephanie, Monty, or Smitty appeared on "CBS Mailbag." Diane Sawyer offered effusive praise for Oprah Winfrey's 50th birthday celebration, and Benjamin McKenzie,…

Dave presents a fabricated political advertisement featuring Dennis Kucinich announcing his marriage to Lorenzo Lamas. In a special, all-canine installment of "Stupid Pet Tricks," a dog offers a greeting to Dave. Ernest Borgnine then introd…

At the "Audience Show & Tell," Dave presented to a collector's assortment of celebrity-chewed gum. A demonstration titled "Will It Float?" saw a tray of billiard balls sink. Bill Cosby performed stand-up comedy. Lou Reed’s capes were displa…

The studio audience had decided Dave’s fate, and Gaines instructed Paul to step in during the segment known as "Survivor Loser." When Dave unexpectedly reappeared during Paul’s interview with Richard Hatch, the program cut to a commercial b…

The champions of the National Turkey Calling competition are showcased. Ryan Seacrest appears via satellite to present a segment titled "Top Ten Catch Phrases Ryan Seacrest Rejected Before 'Seacrest Out!'" Julia Stiles makes a guest appeara…

In the segment known as Mailbag, Biff finds himself sharing a bed with Cameron Diaz. George Clarke steps in to cover for Anna Jack with a demonstration of hula hooping. Alan confesses to a weekly dependence on Vicodin, costing him a thousan…

Dave made the announcement with a grin: he was taking steroids. To substantiate his claim, he produced a series of before-and-after photographs. Biff, meanwhile, embarked on a cruise. The exterior camera captured a scene of Bill Murray, dis…

The twelve-year-old pianist, Chloe Pang, navigated the intricate architecture of Bach's "Goldberg Variations." Dave found himself deeply moved by the performance, nearly overcome with emotion; he later admitted it was among the finest momen…

Dave notes with pride that the WMDB/CBS Orchestra will once again perform as the house band for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremonies, marking their nineteenth consecutive year. He connects with Les Moonves over the telephone,…

Following a fortnight of persistent promotion, Dave displays a solitary Shick Quattro razor – a gift from the company – and reads aloud a rather curious letter penned to Gaines by a colleague. The Top Ten segment is now brought to you by my…

In a brief, initial scene, Tom Hanks presents an Academy Award to Harry Lookman, who accepts it in Hanks’s stead. Later, the actor from *The Ladykillers* bestows a fifty-dollar savings bond upon the absent infant, while Congressman Dennis K…

Andre Barrett, a celebrated figure in American basketball, launched a series of objects from a rooftop, each trajectory aimed at a hoop far below. Six attempts yielded no success; the projectiles all missed their mark. Meanwhile, Al Franken…

George Clarke’s carefully planned weight loss regimen suffers an unexpected setback when a thief absconds with his garments. In other news, Blondie delivers a performance of “Good Boys.”

As the night wore on, Dr. Robert Mundell, the Columbia University professor and 1999 Nobel laureate in economics, regaled the audience with tired, rural humor. Bill DeLace unveiled another installment of his hidden-camera Top Ten segments. …

Following weeks of persistent promotion, Dave finally received a thousand Schick Quattro razors by mail. He announced his intention to distribute them to the audience. Unfortunately, Gaines and Laurie Diamond informed him that the staff had…

A small dispute that emerged earlier this week has been quietly settled, with a contrite CNN anchorwoman offering a sincere apology (details available elsewhere). Additionally, Dave extended congratulations to Craig Kilborn on reaching his …

The segment began with a husband and wife performing a skillful demonstration, expertly manipulating a yo-yo and a quarter in a captivating trick. Following this, Dave engaged in conversation with Tyler Crotty, the young man who had been th…

Rake-attack.com is the new sponsor of the Top Ten list, as Bruce Willis makes a public appearance with a noticeably new hairstyle – one that evokes a certain familiar, understated elegance.

Alan presents a video montage of celebrity birthday greetings for Dave’s 57th, featuring only a fleeting glimpse of Regis Philbin. He calls Les Moonves, the top executive at CBS-TV, and the segment is titled "More With Les." Billy Crystal p…

Biff makes his yearly pilgrimage to Spring Training, and for the second consecutive year, he and Hideki Matsui present their rendition of Abbott and Costello’s "Who's on First?" Jerry playfully inverts Dave to showcase Kai Leclerc's astonis…

The correspondence brought to Paul's attention a misspelling of a letter-writer’s name. He responded with a near-homonym, a linguistic echo that sparked a competitive variation from Biff. Meanwhile, Dave engaged in an unexpected affection f…

The season finale of "Trump or Monkey?" featured a dancer from the musical *Hairspray* as the lucky winner of a purported trip to Acapulco. Meanwhile, David Duchovny shared insights into his son's remarkable aptitude for languages. And afte…

The triumphant Phil Mickelson recounted his 2004 Masters victory, while James Lipton presented Paul with his ceremonial cape.

Al-Qaeda claimed responsibility for Derek Jeter’s recent decline at the plate. Meanwhile, Dave revisited two cherished sound clips from the film *Cold Mountain*. In a bizarre display, stuntman known as “Magic Brian” consumed a lightbulb.

Dave announced the Late Show’s revised mission statement: "We are here for you. We'll make things better." Meanwhile, Rupert hosted the inaugural episode of "Stop the Pump," a game centered around the simple act of fueling up at a gas stati…

Dave declared his intention to be "more dynamic," a decision that manifested in a series of jerky, almost convulsive movements from both himself and Paul. To complement Steph, Monty, and Smitty’s Amelia Earhart impersonation for the Mailbag…

The theater audience is presented with a choice: witness a visit from Tom Hanks, or view archival footage of a camel skiing. Dave maintains the camel footage was the more popular choice. He also confesses to a growing dependence on Bexstra,…

A woman in the audience rotates her hand in a full circle as Hillary Clinton speaks, addressing her husband’s latest publication and the ongoing conflict in Iraq. Meanwhile, The Roots deliver their rendition of "Don't Say Nuthin'."

Economist and Nobel laureate Robert Mundell shares humorous "Yo Mama" jokes; a woman seemingly from the public pretends to experience an earthquake with Rupert; and Shii-Ann Huang, a contestant from the Survivor All-Stars season, introduces…

A panel of ten celebrity mothers—including Dorothy and Gerard, appearing as "Betty Lou Roberts"—reveals their Top Ten picks, followed by the actress who played Julia Roberts’ mother presenting Paul’s cape.

Dave announced that motorcyclist “Johnny McCoy” was scheduled to perform a remarkably dangerous and intricate stunt on 53rd Street, only for the event to be canceled at the last moment. He then directed Jerry to replay the airplane sound ef…

Captured in a late-night taping, the program features an unusual sequence of events. Dave arrives astride a horse, while Robert Sullivan, a specialist in vermin, investigates a rat infestation. Footage is shown of Eric Stangel attempting to…

Chef Emil Castillo crafts a frittata – or, more simply, an omelet – priced at one thousand dollars. Upon its completion, Dave generously douses it with ketchup, a quiet tribute to Tony Randall, who had died that morning. And as a soothing r…

Dave bestowed upon Steph, Monty, and Smitty an unusual appellation – “Gunther.” Meanwhile, baseball icon Randy “Big Unit” Johnson unveiled a Top Ten list centered around the theme of a perfect game.

Dave asserts he suffers from an uncommon strain of tuberculosis, and that a stand-in bearing his likeness awaits backstage, ready for deployment. From her Brooklyn apartment, Kiva "Grinder Girl" Kahl offers commentary on a recent leg injury…

Dave’s substitute remains poised, awaiting direction. He insists on hearing the airplane and Cold Mountain sound effects repeated. Stars from *The Sopranos* are scheduled to perform a Top Ten selection, and Nicole Kidman makes her first app…

Dave offered his congratulations to Sid McGinnis on the arrival of his grandchild. Karate expert Leif Becker endeavored to break five hundred boards within a minute, yet settled for matching his previous best of four hundred and fifteen. A …

The mail brought a curious assortment of notes: Steph, Smitty, and Gunther were channeling Buddy Rice, the flamboyant racer portrayed by Letterman; the new cable channel "Logo" boldly proclaimed the Late Show "the gayest show on television"…

Dave revealed a further rift with CBS, a situation that might provide him with ample opportunity to satirize the network once more. A large ensemble of sailors appeared on stage for "Is This Anything?", while Darrell Hammond delivered his …

A one-and-a-half-pound Porterhouse steak undergoes the classic "Will It Float?" test. Despite Dave's assertion, grounded in scientific principle, that deceased animals generally float, the steak descends beneath the surface. Meanwhile, Bob …

Dave regaled everyone with tales of his victory in last week's Indy 500. Alan’s summary of the first game of the NBA Finals unexpectedly devolved into a striptease. And Bill Murray, with a flourish, declared his new sideline as a circus clo…

Paying tribute to one of the evening’s guests, a former spelling bee champion, Dave notes that the most frequently used word in the English language is "biscuit." A new game, "Cicada/Secada," is derailed by Rupert's accidental exposure of t…

A spirited debate erupted between Dave and Paul regarding a hypothetical brawl: would the formidable Kid Rock prevail against the unflappable Buddy Rice? During the Mailbag segment, Biff journeyed to Wisconsin to assist a law student, but h…

Following the news of Paul’s passing, his band offered a rendition of Ray Charles’ “What’d I Say.” Dave directed Matthew Broderick to the exterior, where he was bathed in water. Jazz pianist Jamie Cullum then performed “All at Sea.”

Jim Gaffigan offered his characteristic observations on marriage and the experience of new fatherhood. Meanwhile, Paul Anka presented his signature cape for this Friday's tribute to James Brown. Following the retirement of the well-worn com…

Dave presents a further photograph of Harry; Paris Hilton reflects on *The Simple Life* and the infamous sex tape that brought her notoriety; and Patti Scialfa, wife of Bruce Springsteen, delivers a rendition of "23rd Street Lullaby."

In an effort to further publicize Popeye's Green Beans, Dave and Paul sample Popeye's chicken while sharing amusing anecdotes. Meanwhile, Ben Stiller’s attempt to shatter windows on the building across the street with a dodgeball culminates…

Michael Moore reflects on his controversial 2003 Academy Awards speech, using the occasion to promote his film *Fahrenheit 9/11*. Meanwhile, Dave playfully dons the Miss Universe sash and crown. The band Los Lobos delivers a performance of …

As night deepened, George Clarke ate fish sticks on the roof, a nightly tribute to the band gracing the marquee below. For the third consecutive evening, Dave screened (carefully polished) footage of a Jeopardy! contestant's indiscretions. …

Dave shared the news that he and Paul would be participating in this weekend's Gay Pride parade. Jennie Ford, a familiar face from previous competitions, will perform "Super Trump or Monkey." Ken Griffey, Jr. is set to present his Top Ten l…

In a segment dedicated to showcasing new items, Dave takes a bite of charcoal briquettes, swallowing them with a mouthful of mouthwash. Meanwhile, The Secret Machines make their television premiere with a performance of "Now Here to Nowhere…

The opening of "Know Your Current Events," delayed for over six months, unfolded with a familiar blend of awkwardness. Dave, mid-scene, managed to stain his trousers with coffee, prompting Paul's practical suggestion of hydrogen peroxide fo…

Dave confesses that a weekend immersed in motorcycle-building documentaries has ignited a desire for his own custom machine. By the close of the program, he has established a motorcycle "gang" with Paul, Dave Dorsett, and Chris Robinson of …

A couple participates in a game called the "Late Show Bill Clinton Memoir Challenge," tasked with locating the name "Monica" within the book in under thirty seconds. Following this, Pat and Kenny reenact Oprah Winfrey's recent conversation …

Dave reactivates the hose camera, playfully targeting passersby with a stream of water. During the Mailbag segment, he presents footage from the new Spider-Man film – specifically, the classic 1960s cartoon – featuring Doctor Octopus tormen…

On 53rd Street, a contest of strength unfolded between two lumberjacks, a scene played out as Will Ferrell showed Dave a home movie. The film depicted his four-month-old "baby"—a gleaming sports car—with affectionate detail.

The musical abilities of Paul, Felecia, and Bruce are once again cruelly undermined on "Stump the Band." "Fat Spider-Man" (George Clarke) offers a remote Top Ten, followed by David Sedaris reading an excerpt from his latest book, *Dress You…

In the first volume of "Where They Would Have Gone For Their Summer Vacation," Biff informs Dave that Charles Bronson would have favored Mohegan Sun Casino in Connecticut. Jeopardy! champion Ken Jennings curates the Top Ten destinations. Da…

Dave remained engrossed in a discussion of motorcycles, while Alan’s baseball commentary was abruptly derailed by the reappearance of a man who had, years prior, inflicted considerable trouble upon him. As if to underscore some unspoken poi…

During the show's Mailbag segment, Dave drew a comparison between President Bush and Porky Pig. A young fan, seemingly enthusiastic only when the program was popular, was removed from the theater. Meanwhile, Hilary Duff was promoting her fi…

**Audience Show & Tell:** Dave engages in conversation with a meteorologist from Connecticut, a name previously noted on "Know Your Current Events." Meanwhile, Dorothy marks her 83rd birthday with a stand-in for Dave and a refrigerator stoc…

A sense of triumph settled over Dave as he reflected on Rahal/Letterman Racing's earlier visit to the White House. Meanwhile, a precarious scene unfolded as three stagehands, from a height of ninety feet above the street, attempted to smudg…

To commemorate the moonwalk's 35th anniversary, Hello Deli introduces a new game: "Would You Like to Plant a Flag on the Moon?" Rupert selects a contestant from Yukon, Oklahoma, and Dave playfully teases her about her aspirations.

News cameras capture the scene of Pete Rose's restaurant, emptied of its contents save for a single Late Show t-shirt. During a discussion of the Sandy Berger affair, Dave inadvertently spits on Tony. The Hives deliver a performance of "Wal…

A woman in the Cincinnati audience levitates a grape with a gentle puff of air. Dave offers his opinion on Krispy Kreme’s latest doughnut shake, followed by a mock advertisement for Burger King's new Liquid Whopper. Britney Murphy and Dave …

As the Olympic Games drew nearer, Dave offered a casual reminder of his current use of steroids. A member of the studio audience, seemingly tired of the routine, directed a rather blunt instruction at Regis. Biff then delivered his second r…

Dave, known for his exceptional cantankerousness, makes a strained attempt to apologize to Regis over the phone, only to abruptly disconnect. He subsequently answers every inquiry on CBS Mailbag with an unwavering, "Who cares?" Meanwhile, B…

Biff's attempts to interview Michael Moore prove fruitless. Natalie Portman discusses her intimate moments with her canine companion, Charlie. And on stage, Ambulance Ltd. delivers a performance of "Primative."

Substituting for Paul once again, Anton introduces "Will It Float?" for the first time. Rosie Perez recounts a humorous anecdote concerning an actor prone to spitting while speaking. Alan Kalter prompts Dave to discuss his new romance, only…

The guest chairs have been rearranged, and a change has been made to Dave’s desk. During the segment titled "Who Asked For It?", a member of the audience vanishes without a trace. Meanwhile, Pamela Anderson boasts of engaging in sexual acti…

President Clinton engaged in conversation with Dave on a range of subjects before kindly autographing a copy of his book for Harry. The evening also featured a performance by Natalie Merchant, who sang "Sally Ann."

Michael Bearden and Anton continue to fill in for Paul, a fact that prompts Dave to ask Anton how Paul might react to certain remarks made during the show. During the Mailbag segment, Pat Farmer attempts to define the duration of a "New Yor…

Dave offers a final conversation with his longtime colleague, writer Gerard Mulligan, a session accompanied by a montage of clips, rich in material from the NBC era.